Head Home Previous Next Last

My Secret to a Good Night's Sleep

The big downer was to do with the kitchen sink faucet.

Last night I slept — through the night —for eight hours. I didn't think it was possible. 

For the last year or whatever/forever I've been waking up at five, three, two, one —even midnight. But last night I did it, I slept through the night. Not that I felt completely refreshed — I guess that I still have to make up for the zillions of hours of sleep that I already missed, but it's a start.

So, what's my secret? I don't know. I'll tell you my story — you decide.

Yesterday was a very busy day — with big ups and problematic downs. My big up was that I started teaching my Spring 2021 Songwriting class — and it went very well. The big downer was my attempt to fix the kitchen faucet.

We have one of those pull down faucets and the hose was leaking. After checking, it looked like the hose needed replacing. So, I called my go-to plumber. Great plumber.

Too good, in fact. Since he helped when I moved in five years ago and I gave him stellar ratings, his business has grown and he's hired a crew of other plumbers. They are all good, but it takes longer to get one and their prices have skyrocketed.

Anyway, I called the plumber and I got his appointment booker. We discuss the details and he gives me a price —but — that doesn't include the hose. He said that they can't supply the hose. There are too many variations. I should buy the hose and call them back.

Frankly speaking, the major reason I called the plumber was because I didn't want to figure out what hose to buy and where to buy it.

So, I did some searching on the net, looked at the existing faucet and its connections, and called around. I finally found a plumbing store that had a replacement hose —and it was part of a kit with universal connections. Why didn't the plumber's appointment booker know that? Why — because he's an appointment booker, not a plumber.

So, I masked up and got the part. So far, so good. According to the videos on the net, once I had the hose, it wouldn't be so difficult to install it. And it shouldn't have been — except things didn't fit. The parts fit fine — it's just that I didn't fit. That's right — I didn't fit.

To get to the plumbing under the sink requires getting under the sink. Well, I'm 74 years old and weigh 190 pounds with a chest that tapes at 46 inches — and an opening to get to the plumbing under the sink that is 13 inches wide.


After shutting off the hot and cold water supplies, the first "easy" thing to do was to disconnect the fitting connecting the supply line to the faucet line. It should be easy — but whoever installed it must have used too small a hose and it was way up and behind the sink.

I had to wiggle in the cramped space to finally get my tools on it. It was really tight — stuck. It took over an hour to get it loose. Then I pulled it out through the arching tube.

Then for the next "easy" part. I was to put the new tube back up through the arch — that was actually easy, and then push the new tube down through the bottom of the faucet into the cabinet below.

It wouldn't go. I tried over and over. It wouldn't go. My wife, Adele, was standing by making "helpful" suggestions, so I said, "Okay, you try." She couldn't. We tried just about everything —finally giving up and calling my favorite plumber again. We made an appointment for two days later. Meanwhile, I thought that I would sleep on it.

Well, like I said, I had a wonderful night's sleep. It had to be a combination of being dead tired, taking ibuprofen, rubbing my sore back with Icy-Hot, and my wife taking CBD. She slept — I slept.

In the morning, I took another look and thought that maybe if I disassembled the faucet, I'd have a better chance to snake through the hose. I tried it first with the old hose and it worked. Then, I tried it with the new hose, and after about thirty tries, it worked.

By this point, Adele convinced me that her lithe yoga-toned body was more suited for the crawling space and I agreed to hand over the screwdriver to her. She easily crawled in, found the screw that needed to be tightened to hold the fixture in place, and once we agreed to what clock-wise and counter-clock-wise meant (maybe I should have used righty-tighty) the screw was tightened.

I reopened the water valves, checked for leaks, and made some final adjustments — and we were good-to-go. I called my plumber and cancelled.

Between working on the faucet, writing this story and arguing with Adele, I've passed my morning away.

Could you think of anything more rewarding during these days of quarantine?

I'm hoping to have another good night's sleep. More ibuprofen and Icy-Hot for me. More CBD for Adele.

~ Al Zagofsky









Last page
Next page
Previous page
Home page